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Emotional energy on the campaign trail

Ripped from the headlines Was just interviewed by CNN on this topic based on our award-winning book The Emotional Energy Factor (which has a 5-star rating on Amazon!)…but first a disclaimer.  We don’t...

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Is divorce the end of family and love?

A recent piece in the NYTimes tells a story of love and family restored after divorce.  No, the marriage wasn’t restored.  And no, the kind of love that brings people into a relationship wasn’t...

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TOO GOOD TO LEAVE in the news

In today’s NYTimes, there’s an important piece that validates what we said in our book Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay: that you can be happy staying in your marriage, if that’s right for you.  And...

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EMOTIONAL ENERGY in the news

The great health pioneer Dean Ornish, in the Huffington Post, has just written a lovely piece about The Emotional Energy Factor.  Ornish really gets what we’re trying to do in that book, as when he...

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“I would never cheat…or would I?”

Ripped from the headlines Well, this was an interesting interview!  We’ve often been asked how likely it is that your partner will cheat on you.  This, for a major women’s publication, switches it...

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The American marriage today is in trouble, but not in the way you think

If you ask most people, they’ll say there’s too much divorce.  And they’re likely to say that half of all marriages end in divorce.  Scary, isn’t it? they’ll say.  But the fact is that things are both...

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Granny heads for splitsville

Well, you probably saw this coming.  The world is going to hell, so why not: grandma and grandpa are getting divorced.  So sad.  So selfish.  So silly.  Do they even know what they’re doing?  Who put...

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Can lying about what we write save your newspaper career?

I don’t know, but that seems like a fair question when someone writes a newspaper article titled “Can an Affair Save a Marriage?” and then goes on to say US marriage therapist Mira Kirshenbaum outraged...

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Down with Valentines day! Up with love!

What was St. Valentine—you know, the guy—all about and what does he have to do with us?  The truth is that Valentine was a Roman Christian martyr.  What’s more…  Well, there is no what’s more, because...

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First comes bad marriage, then comes stress…

…and the next thing you know, your health is a mess. According to a number of studies coming out over the past couple of years, bad marriages have bad consequences for our health.  Our heart health,...

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Divorce 2016

When it comes to social issues, like abortion and gay marriage, the tide has been running mostly in one direction for the last 50 years: towards more liberal attitudes.  That’s why social conservatives...

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We’re back! And trust is still the issue…

         I know.  It’s been a long, long time since we’ve posted a blog.  March, I think—over 5 months.  No, we haven’t been lost at sea.  We’ve been crazy busy selling the house we’ve lived in in...

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American affairs: how we feel, what we do

Again, apologies.  We’re slowly getting up to speed with our blog posts.  Here’s a new one, in our ripped from the headlines series.  This is an interview we did for a writer for what is probably the...

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Is life meaningless?

You hear this a lot.  At least I hear this a lot from people.  ”What’s the point?  Life is just a desert.  You’re born.  You die.  So what?  What difference does it make?  Life just doesn’t seem to...

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Doing better next year

The year’s coming to an end and many of us, or some of us, or please God at least one of us! is looking back and reviewing their life, what’s happened, what they want to happen next.  This is a very...

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The 5 most important books on relationship therapy

This is a big day!  It’s not only Valentine’s Day–Happy Valentine’s Day!–but it’s also the day an interview with us in relationship therapy appeared on the famous Five Books website.  Here’s the link...

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The secret of confidence

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Against complaining

Is there someone in your family who complains all the time?  Then you know what a corrosive irritant complaining is.  You can bear the complaining for a while, but then it begins to get to you, and the...

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The ultimate, best ever, top 10 do’s and don’ts for having a long and happy...

I keep getting requests for this, so…you’re welcome! If you want a long, happy marriage, all you need is a bathroom mirror. Then write down these 10 do’s and don’ts, tape them to the side of your...

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You only loved the dream child

We first ran this piece almost twenty years ago, and we’re still asked about it.  Time for a re-run.  And this time, a bit of a re-write too.             Love is not enough.  Not in marriage.  Not in...

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