A loyal reader of this blog wrote me a very simple question: What is confidence?
This opens up an issue important for lots of us. A huge issue.
So many of us are hungry to feel confident in so many parts of our life: talking to strangers, standing up to our boss, having sex, asking for something, doing something new or hard, raising a child, learning something new, managing a new project…you name it.
So of course most of us would love to know the secret of confidence. What do all those seemingly confident people out there have that we don’t have?
First of all, believe me!: the vast majority of those seemingly confident people feel much less confident on the inside than they project on the outside. What we call confident people is mostly just people who are good at faking confidence.
Second, and more important, most people don’t really understand what confidence is in the first place.
Confidence is not a feeling. Instead, it’s (more…)